“Never knowingly fully dressed”

Words cannot begin to explain how much I miss Rome, so I was hopeful BBC2’s The Tudors could somehow fill that void. And it kind of does – though without scaling the dizzy heights of twisted drama, hilarious dialogue and sublime excess of its swords and sandals predecessor.

Disappointingly, The Tudors is played totally straight, with only the odd, far too softcore sex scene there to remind you that you’re not watching a BBC learning docu-drama. Rome used the fact that we all knew how it was all going to end to its advantage, spicing up proceedings with double-edged one-liners and dramatic irony. The dialogue in The Tudors isn’t half as funny – in fact the only thing remotely funny is Sam Neill who appears to have come along dressed as Cardinal Richelieu from Dogtanian.

What The Tudors does have in common with Rome is the unflinchingly testosterone levels, giving a homoerotic feel to the drama. Jonathan Rhys Meyers is superb as Henry VIII, as cocky, conceited and bullish as a medieval monarch should be. Never knowingly fully dressed, Henry bed-hops, wrestled and jousts his way through his leadership and looks great at all times. His entourage - including Henry Cavil and Callum Blue – are equally photogenic and obliging when it comes to gratuitous nudity.

The sex and action sequences are great. Things falter when Sam Neill or Jeremy Northam appear in their roles as Basil Exposition. And what we’re really missing is a strong woman – at the heart of Rome was the rivalry between pushy mothers/mistresses Atia and Servilia. The Tudors is far more a masculine affair, and that’s what lets it down – we need some scheming wenches and hopefully Queen Katherine will grow into that role soon.