It’s always been to true to say that Neighbours is often quite gay. But now that label can be attached to the show in a non-derogatory sense – which is good, as Susan Smith (formerly Kennedy), is not best pleased when the word is used unkindly. Not only is Connor dating another bloke (most likely Lou, who after his recent stint in the clink may have discovered the love that dare not speak it’s name) on the internet, but Erinsbrough High now has its own resident lesbian. It was perhaps inevitable that Lana was gay – not only does she love fantasy TV and cool music, but she speaks with a bizarre, trans-Atlantic twang that defies explanation. After launching herself at Sky – whose bra-burning ways made her the ideal candidate – her secret is out, and comedy ADD-suffered Scott/Stingray delicately broached the subject by writing Lana’s a Lezzer on the blackboard. Natually, Lana won’t stay around – a regular gay being even scarier than a regular ethnic minority for Aussie viewers – but at least we have the Hoyland’s being targeted by a Molotov-cocktail-wielding fly-poster, Izzy being stalked by Darcy as her wedding approaches, an increasingly evil Paul Robinson returning and Lassiters being razed to the ground in a bad-taste, Bali-eqsue bomb plot to look forward to over the next couple of months.